Boy I scored a lot of points around the ponderosa with this week’s quitting. NOT!

I’ve been at this quitting thing for a while now and since this is the time of year where I usually take a look back at the previous twelve months I thought I’d list the things I’ve quit thus far. So in no particular order, here they are:

It’s quite a list but I don’t intend it as some sort of “Look at me, aren’t I so cool?” sort of thing. Not that I’ve never wanted to be cool. Let’s face it I grew up with “The Fonz”. But over the years I’ve managed to work through those types of things. I’ve gone from someone who stressed over the very shirt they wore to “6th Grade Day” (more on that in the t-shirts section someday) to someone with literally less than six shirts that I wear to work (see Polos and Oxfords, Oh my! for a bit of a discussion on these). It’s safe to say I gave up on “cool” a while ago.

As I alluded to above, appearances used to be a big deal especially back in my teen angst years in junior high. Now? Not so much. And that fits nicely with my quitting for this week. As I review the things I’ve quit over the past 13 weeks I see some external things (drinking, eating candy, television) and some internal things (expectations, lying to myself, letting others have ownership). I’ve said this before but it bears repeating; the internal stuff is harder than the external stuff. This Thursday’s quitting might put the internal with the external better than anything yet though because this Thursday I’m quitting cutting my hair for the rest of 2017.

Yeah, you guessed it. That picture was my dome. I have to say it doesn’t look as awful as I thought it might. I’ve always had a big head. I remember having to wear a helmet from the high school when I played 8th grade football. Then there’s the ridge down the middle (which wasn’t quite as big as I anticipated I have to say). So all in all it’s not quite as hideous as anticipated. Unless… you ask my spouse. She wasn’t so upset about the not cutting my hair thing as she was about the sort of starting from zero thing.

I get it but then again it’s only hair. Truth be told, I’ve faced female opposition to my appearance choices in the past. There’s been the ear ring, the drab clothing (both college) and the clothing choices in general (who knew I was red/green color blind). To be fair some of these are my mom and some are my spouse but I think they’ve both generally been of the same mindset. There are lots of stories there but who wants to go into them at this point? We’ll just stick to hair and appearance in general.

As I said to my dad (yeah, he weighed in on this too), it will grow back. (Unless it doesn’t and I’d be okay with that too) See, I care a lot less about how I look at this point than maybe some of my family does. That stems from having come to the conclusion that I care a lot less about how people look than about what they do. That standard applies to me too. Even words, as cheap as they can be, are more important if we’re showing our care for others. They still matter more than if the person has short hair, long hair, blue hair or no hair at all. I get their point when they ask why, though. I understand that they think perhaps someone in my position shouldn’t shave their head. I suppose it’s a valid point but I’ve been turning my back on those concerns for years, since I was about 17 really and I haven’t been booted out of the human race yet.

Am I in the cool kids’ club? Probably not. Do I want to be in the cool kids club? Sure, who doesn’t? But if I have to look a certain way to be in it I shake my head “no” even if I get the invitation. I’m okay with the fact that I may be pigeon-holed or profiled or judged as something I’m not based on my appearance. I decided a long time ago that if you were the sort of person who did this, we were probably not on the same wavelength and might not be friends in the first place. That’s not to say I don’t make an effort to impress people, I do. It’s just not with my hair, clothes, car, house or any other material thing. In fact, I probably try harder to let people get to know me when the chances are greater that they will try to judge me by my appearance or any of those other things than I do if they seem to accept them as they are. It’s my attempt to teach them that even we LBM’s (Large Bald Men, my wife’s moniker, not mine) can be nice guys and someone you’d like to get to know.

So there you have it, sort of the inside/out on this week’s quitting. Like I said, it seems to put both sides of why I quit things together perhaps better than any other. I’ll keep you up to date on the growth.

 

I hope you liked this and I’m wondering if you’ve had any experiences with being judged by your appearance. I imagine everyone has. If you would like to share I’d love to hear your stories below and if you have someone in your life that might benefit from an old LBM’s ramblings, please share with them using the icons below. 

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