I’ve gone down these paths so many times even the dog knows what’s coming

I don’t suppose I’m much different than a lot of people; I love convenience. Whether it’s a store or something I can do while I sit on my butt or something I can get delivered to my doorstep, I am all in. So it should be no surprise that I love the drive through.

I drive through to get my dry cleaning, do my banking (when I can’t do it online, see above), get cash (that I’ll possibly use at another drive through) and unfortunately to get a snack or a meal. I say unfortunately because there’s very few things we get at drive throughs (or thrus, I’ve never understood this, is it like theatre or shoppe?) that’s good for us. Sure, some of the places have healthy alternatives but even they can be so very unhealthy (Thank you Runza, Sweet Berry Chicken Salad). And now you’re a little freaked out that I know these things aren’t you? Hence this week’s resolution.

Yep, you guessed it, I’m quitting the drive through, at least as far as the edible things go. I’ll still get my prescriptions this way and a coffee occasionally (what am I, some kind of animal?) but there’ll be no more snacky snacks or meals handed through the 2nd window of shame (You know the one after you’ve paid your money and they tell you to have a nice day. The response is always, “You too” as you speed away) Aaaand, now you’re freaked out again, aren’t you? I’m telling you it’s a bit of a disease. Maybe I should start a support group.

We could call it the RDTAA. We would be the Recovering Drive Through Addicts Anonymous, not to be confused with an actual RDTA which is a rebuildable dripping tank atomizer and has to do with vaping. And no, I know nothing about these things. I had to look that up on the internet. We could have groups and meetings with coffee (no doughnuts, have to be respectful of those who made Krispy Kreme their favorite DT) and just some honesty about why we love to eat and drink and drive. We’d dig into our psyche’s and find where our problem started, why it continued and where it went horribly, horribly wrong. For me, I blame my kids.

Had I not been the chief taxi/uniform/homework and book delivery service for all those years I may (may) have been able to avoid my addiction. I might have had a chance if I didn’t spend many nights AIS (ass in seat) from quitting time until 7:30 or 8:00. I mean, really, when’s a guy going to eat? Now, please, no hate mail, you have to know I’m kidding here and I loved my time shepherding my kids and their friends all over town. It was a labor of love. Really, I have the food baby to prove it.

So, this Thursday it ends. No more drive thru. I’ll miss the convenience but not as much as the tacos. I’ll miss the ease of grabbing a bite but not as much as the burgers. Finally I’ll miss the ice cream but truly not nearly as much as I already miss seeing our little monsters devour a happy meal and leave fries to petrify in between the seats. It’s just time to move on.

Maybe you’re like me (let’s hope you’re not that far gone) and you need to cut your journeys down these lanes of shame out or at least to a minimum. If so, I hope my resolution gives you some encouragement or at least makes you feel better about yourself. Share it around if you think your friends might need the same, or an intervention.

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